Positively, Dodie!

Check Out My New Website!!!!

2010-11-24T19:36:00.000-08:00

Thank you for visiting my website, however, this site is no longer in service.

Please visit my new site at www.DodieBlomberg.com.

Looking forward to connecting with you, again!

Teaching Parenting the Positive Discipline Way

2010-01-19T07:18:00.000-08:00

Teaching Parenting

the

Positive Discipline Way

Be a Positive Discipline Educator and create positive change in your life!

Who should attend?

Parent Educators, family therapists, social workers, parents, psychologists, coaches,

school personnel, and those who are looking for new ideas,

innovative activities, and contagious enthusiasm!!

March 25 & 26, 2010

Teaching Parenting the Positive Discipline Way

(Train the Trainer)

Two Day Certification Workshop

Thursday, March 25 and Friday, March 26, 2010

Teaching Parenting the Positive Discipline Way (developed by Lynn Lott and Jane Nelsen) provides a step-by-step approach to starting and leading experientially based parenting groups. This program stands alone or offers significant enhancement to any program through experiential activities that reach the heart to inspire deeper understanding and change. Parents love the Parents Helping Parents Problem-Solving Steps because this process provides a fun and effective way for them to get specific help with real problems.

Imagine!!

*Supporting parents in learning new tools and skills to create more respectful relationships with their children!*Having the opportunity to practice these tools and skills at every workshop!

*Creating an income doing something you are passionate about!!

What participants will walk away with....

**A understanding of the belief behind the behavior. (Knowledge)

**The experience of facilitating PD parenting activities. (Experience)

**Knowing the difference between facilitating and lecturing. (Coaching Skills)

**A binder full of experiential activities for parents and teenagers (Activities)

**A connection with others who are passionate about parenting. (Connection)

Where, When & How??

A New Leaf Training Center

Thursday, March 25 and Friday, March 26

8:30 - 4:30pm

Fee: $295 per person (Includes binder and book)

To Register: Go to http://www.positivediscipline.org/

To Learn More: Go to http://www.positivediscipline.org/

Question?: email Dodie at DodieBlombergPDA@yahoo.com

Positive Discipline in the Classroom Workshop

2009-08-24T12:59:00.000-07:00

Positive Discipline in the Classroom Workshop

If you are a classroom teacher, and want to enhance your students' skills in responsibility, reliability, and problem solving ... you won't want to miss this workshop!

What is Positive Discipline?

Hundreds of schools also use these amazingly effective strategies for restoring order and civility to today's turbulent classrooms. Now you too can use this philosophy as a foundation for fostering cooperation, problem-solving skills, and mutual respect in children. Imagine, instead of controlling behavior, you can be teaching; instead of confronting apathy, you will enjoy motivated, eager students!

Inside, you'll discover how to:
*Create a classroom climate that enhances academic learning
*Use encouragement rather than praise and rewards
*Instill valuable social skills and positive behavior through the use of class meetings
*Understand the motivation behind students' behavior instead of looking for causes
*And much more!

Where, When and How to Register?

Friday and Saturday, October 16 & 17, 2009

From 8:30 - 4:30 pm

Red Mountain United Methodist Church

2936 Power Rd, Mesa, AZ 85213

Fee: Early registration (30 days in advanced) $295

Regular registration $330

(Includes the pictured above: binder of activities, book and cd)

To Register: go to http://www.positivediscipline.org/

Creating Solutions Instead of Chaos

2009-08-24T12:06:00.000-07:00

Creating Solutions Instead of Chaos:

Positive Discipline for Parents of Elementary Age Children

This is a 3 1/2 hour parent class that will reinspire parents to use the many respectful, helpful and effective Positive Discipline tools with their children!

Participants will experience and understand:

*Different parenting styles

*4 Mistaken Goals of Misbehavior

*Solutions instead of Punishment

*4+ Unwanted Results of Punishment

*Positive Time Out

*Parents Helping Parents Problem Solving Steps

**And Much Much More!!

Where, When & How Much?

Saturday, September 26, 2009

1:00 - 4:30 pm

Red Mountain United Methodist Church

2936 Power Road, Mesa 85213

$ 50 per person (fee includes a Positive Discipline book .. a $16.95 value)

$ 35 per person with no book

To Register: Click on the PayPal button below and choose with a book or without!

Question: email Dodie at DodieBlombergPDA@yahoo.com

or call: 480-213-0341

Positive Discipline for Preschool Teachers

2009-08-06T19:17:00.000-07:00

Positive Discipline

for Preschool Teachers

6 Great CEU's in just one day!

Get re-inspired and gain great tools for growing capable students!

Participants will experience and understand:

Different teaching styles
Mistaken goals behind "misbehavior"
Difference between praise and encouragement
Effective class meetingsPositive time-out
And many Positive Discipline tools and skills!

When: Saturday, August 29, 2009 from 9AM - 4:30 PM

Where: Red Mountain United Methodist Church

2936 N. Power Rd., Mesa 85213

Fee: $65 per person (includes Positive Discipline for Preschoolers book.. $16.95 value)

To Register: Use the paypal button below!

Upcoming Positive Discipline for Parents in June

2009-01-28T18:55:00.000-08:00

Discipline That Teaches: Creating a Positive Home

Take some time out for yourself to have some fun, laugh, and learn some great tools for creating a more positive home. This 3 1/2 hour workshop will focus on:

The difference between empowering and enabling children.

The four mistaken goals of "mis"kbehavior and what parents can do to encourage helpful behaviors.

Parents Helping Parents Problem Solving Steps: Ways to create solutions instead of power struggles.

Parents will leave with a "pocket full" of solutions, tools and skills to create a more peaceful home and children who are more responsible, reliable, and capable!

Discipline That Teaches: Creating a Positive Home

Saturday, June 20, 2009

from 1:00 - 4:30

Red Mountain United Methodist Church

$35 per person/ $50 per person includes a book

To Register: Click on options below...using PayPal...

Helping Things Go Right

2009-01-23T19:25:00.001-08:00

I had the opportunity to observe some preschool classrooms this week. Oh, my, goodness!! I believe that preschool teachers are some of the luckiest teachers around. The preschool students that I hung out with that morning were so incredibly sunny, cheerful, insightful, fun, excited, inquisitive, and just darn cute!! Really, I could not get enough of them.

HOW do preschool teachers support, encourage, teach and nurture such varying personalities, differences in development, and temperment? As I sat quietly in the corner, simply observing teacher and student interaction, I was reminded of a powerful phrase in the book, The Anatomy of Peace, by the Arbinger Institute. Helping Things Go Right. Simply. Very effective parents and teachers spend 90% of their energy and time Helping Things Go Right.

I observed 2 simple behaviors and attitudes that these highly effective preschool teachers were demonstrating that were helping things go right. The teachers were acknowledging and identifying actions that the preschoolers were exhibiting that were helpful. For example, if a student was following a classroom routine, the teacher might have said, " Christina, I noticed that you picked up all of your wrappers from your snack and pushed your chair in when you were finished eating. That is very helpful." This encourages Christina for her cooperation, and at the same time it creates awareness for the other preschoolers who are almost ready to clean up. They know just what to do with out being "told".

The second simple behavior these encouraging teachers demonstrated was asking a lot of questions. They were What and How Questions. Asking children questions about what "we" do next, or how to do something inspires processing and thinking. We want to give our children lots of opportunities to think for themselves. And when THEY KNOW what is next or figure out HOW to solve a problem, they feel capable and empowered. Just what we hope for them. "Telling" children constantly what and how to do things, may be speedy but it doesn't grow the perception of "I'm capable". There is no thinking and problem solving involved. It can feel like being bossed around, which can inspire rebellion.

So, two easy ways to help things go right:
*acknowledge and identify the helpful or cooperative actions
*ask what and how questions to inspire "I am capable!"

When we, as parents and teachers, choose to spend 90% of our time and energy Helping Things Go Right, then we'll only need to spend 10% on fixing things when they go wrong. HMMMM, sounds like a good use of my time and energy!!

What a great workshop!

2008-11-16T07:00:00.000-08:00

I just facilitated a two day workshop in Mesa called "Teaching Parenting the Positive Discipline Way." What a great workshop. We had participants from Tempe, Mesa, Apache Junction and Texas!! This workshop trains participants to become Certified Positive Discipline Parent Educators. Positive Discipline teaches tools and skills that are respectful, encouraging, connecting, focused on solutions, and teach long term life skills. They are not permissive nor authoritarian in nature; they are both kind and firm, which is good for parents and children.

I want to thank all of the amazing people who attended the two day training with me! I learned so much from each and every one of you, and I sense that we all learned from each other! Knowing that each of you will share respectful parenting tools with parents in your area is soooo encouraging to me! Let's each go out and change the world...one child, one parent, one family, one community at a time!!!

Love of Movement

2008-05-28T14:23:00.000-07:00

As a child, my mom always signed me up for dance class. Once or twice a week, I'd ballet, tap, or tumble the afternoon away. The ballet was a little boring for me, then I discovered tumbling. Oh, yeah, cartwheels, back bends, walk overs...oh boy. Loved It!

When I hit the double digits, I discovered gymnastics. Wow, not just the tumbling mat, there was equipment to hang from, swing from, and vault over. This was great fun. I spent my afternoons in highschool in the gynmnastics gym, enjoying movement. I really loved the challenge of learning a new move. I'd need to gain strength, flexibility and speed for each new "trick". But I'd work hours, days, and weeks to master a new skill. Overall, I spent most of my teenage years working out and feeling strong (internally and externally).

Once I graduated from high school, the competitive gymnastics stopped for me (I'm almost 5'9''...a little tall for a collegiate gymnast). And working out pretty much stopped for me too. When college began, I felt a whole lot of stress, anxiety, and physical unease. I really didn't know what it was all about, but I struggled a great deal. Then my second semester in college I signed up for a healthy living class. I thought it was book work of healthy living...you know, learn about protein, carbs, etc. Well, it was a two hour class, two days a week. The first hour was book work and the second hour was jogging on the indoor track! OH, no..... I have asthma, running is not for me! I went to a community college, so there were "old" people in my class. Even two grandmothers!! Well if they could run/walk for the hour, I could too.

So, I began jogging a lap, then walking a lap. Moved to jogging two laps, walking one lap. You get it.....I slowly increased the jogging...pretty slow, but jogging just the same. In the end I was able to run 3 whole miles with out stopping!!! What was most amazing though, was how I felt. My stress and anxiety decreased greatly. I became more calm, focused, and felt better inside and out. What I learned about myself, is that I was born to move.

Since that class back in 1984, I have been exercising every few days. I still have asthma, but I listen to my body and go at MY pace. I love muscle classes. The feeling of strength and power!! But most of all, keeping my body moving keeps me feeling sane, calm, settled, focused, etc. When I begin feeling out of sorts....I go to the gym.

Rewards....like training wheels

2008-05-28T13:53:00.000-07:00

So, I have spent quite a bit of time coaching a classroom teacher on how to create a cooperative classroom. This teacher is soooooo kind, she boarders on permissive. I get the sense that she doesn't want her students to feel uncomfortable or stressed. (In the end, they all feel uncomfortable and stressed due to the lack of clear boundaries).

The last two weeks of school were coming up and the students were really pushing the teacher, each other and the rest of the staff to the limit. I was asked to come in and help the class get through the last two weeks in one piece. So, I decided to uses rewards. But not a one to one connection, more of a possibility to GET something. The teacher and I had small orange tickets to give out to the students when they were following directions, working hard, being helpful, or doing any thing that helped to create a calm atmosphere in the classroom. When we'd give the ticket to a student, we'd state what they were doing to get the orange chance ticket. Something like, "I appreciate ________ working quietly on their assignment" or "I'd like to thank _______ for helping your neighbor out on that assignment, that is so helpful". The shift in the classroom was amazing. The students sat up straighter, stayed seated longer, raised their hands, completed assignments, etc.

I believe in Positive Discipline, an Adlerian approach to teaching children helpful life skills instead of punishment. The Positive Discipline approach does not agree with rewards. The reason being is that children then behave in a certain way in order to GET the reward, they don't behave in the helpful manner simply because it is best for all involved. (I really agree with this!) I want my children to behave "appropriately" because internally they know it is the right thing to do, not because they'll get a toy, candy or money. However, in this situation, I learned something.

In this situation, the teacher was not clear or consistent with letting her students know what was expected of them. As simpl as: how to ask a question (raise hands), what working position looks like (seated, chair pulled in, all 4 feet on the ground), or what to do when finished with an assignment (read a book, complete a different assignment, or draw). Giving the teacher little orange tickets and asking her to compliment students when they were being helpful, clarified for the teacher what she was looking for. The teacher became much more consistent at giving compliments, asking for what she wanted, and knowing what she wanted. It was so interesting. The teacher became more clear and specific on directions and thus the students followed more often.

So, now my perspective of rewards is that they can be like training wheels. When children advance to a two wheeled bike, they need strong support, a whole lot of the time, but just for a little while. As they become more comfortable with what is required to balance on a two wheeled bike AND become more skilled at it, the children want the training wheels lifted higher. (Only to be there in an emergency). And once they really feel their own weight, can balance, take turns, stop and go pretty well, what do they say? "MOM, DAD, please get these training wheels off!"

I'm feeling the same way with rewards. They might be a good beginning for grown-up and children. Rewards help the adult to be aware of the situation, to notice the behaviors they really want, and helps with consistent follow through. For the child, rewards are a strong support, a whole lot of the time, until they begin to feel and understand what is required of them. As they become more skilled and feel capable of the new behavior or task.... someone will say, "HEY, please stop the rewards, you can do this on your own..... or I can do this on my own!"

Think of the different areas of your life that you'd like to have training wheels for???

Punishment

2008-04-20T07:24:00.000-07:00

I had a big Aha yesterday. I teach a dodgeball class for 8-12 year olds every Saturday at a local gym. It is so much darn fun! Sometimes when the teams are uneven I get to play too. And usually, when a child comes to the class one time, they are hooked and can't wait to come back next Saturday.

Last Saturday, one of the usual dodgeball players (I'll call her Jennifer to keep her anonymous) who comes pretty regularly, arrived and looked pretty sad and low energy. Now this gal is usually high energy, very cheerful, and is fun to be around. I asked her a few times, what was up and I got no response. So, I asked my 9 year old daughter to chat with her and find out what was going on. Well, I never figured it out during the dodgeball hour. But "Jennifer" spent a whole lot of energy working to be grumpy, low energy, and to not have fun. I was so curious about what was going on for her, this was soooo unlike her.

I ran into her dad after class, in the gym. So, I let him know how Jennifer wasn't herself in class and that I hoped everything is ok. He said that the reason she was so grumpy was because she was "in trouble" and getting a punishment as soon as she got home from the gym. This just caught me off guard. So, I said something like, "What did she do?" He said that it was about what she didn't do before they came to the gym, something about shoes. (I couldn't quite get the gist of it). I then jokingly, said, "Well, she made herself so miserable during dodgeball, that you may be able to skip the punishment." He smiled and left.

This senario went through my head a lot of the day. This cheerful 9 year old was miserable for a whole hour during a class that she usually loves. And on top of that, when she got home, she was going to get a punishment. HMMM. I was sensing that there was a big empty space between her and her dad that morning. And in that space was anger, resentment, revenge, powerstruggles, and more. (I sense this dad as a good and loving dad...really...wanting to raise a good and loving daughter) But the feelings between them that morning were not good and loving.

Punishment: According to two 13 year olds that I know...they define punishment as a purposeful consequence that grown-ups do TO kids as a result of a bad behavior or choice, but a simple consequence is the natural result of a bad behavior or choice. We grown-ups experience natural consequences in our daily lives when we make a bad choice or make a mistake. We then get the opportunity to figure out HOW to make it right or HOW to do it better next time. Why can't we let our children do the same. Why do so many parents feel the need to add on another man made ugly experience to the bad choice or mistake?? HHMMM.

I have been fortunate enough to be trained in Positive Discipline. I have had the opportunity to learn that mistakes are simply opportunities to learn. (good thing, cause I make a whole lot of mistakes) I try my best to simply allow my children (ages 12 and 9) to learn from their mistakes. I don't have to add on another bad feeling (which would be between me and them) onto the already uncomfortable experience of the mistake or bad choice. We sit down and discuss what happened?, what did you hope would happen?, how would you do it next time?, and I always add in, how can I help? They take ownership for the experience, I don't have to "fix" it for them, and everything is out in the open. I am their support, guide, and biggest encourager. The last thing I want to be is their enemy, their mistake pointer outer, or judge. My goal is to raise children who feel capable, can solve their own problems, can ask for help, and to have the sense that they have control over their lives.

Do you remember a time (as a kid) that you were punished? What do you remember? How did you feel? What were your thoughts? Did the punishment correct your behavior?

For myself, I remember being punished. I cannot remember WHAT I was punished for, but I remember being sooo angry at my mom. I was going to show her. I wasn't going to cry. I remember looking at her with a straight face and my arms crossed over my chest. Kind of defiant. Thinking, I'm not going to let you know how hurt my heart is...I won't...... THAT is what I remember.... HMMMMM.....

Belief Behind the Behavior

2008-04-02T19:11:00.000-07:00

I love kindergarteners! They are transparent, meaning they almost always vebalize what is going on internally for them.

In Positive Discipline there is an Adlerian theory that states when children "misbehave" there is a misguided belief behind their behavior. I got to experience this first hand in a kindergarten classroom. The kindergarten teacher had been struggling with many students "misbehavior". She tended to focus on the unwanted behavior and not acknowledge appropriate behavior. Only focusing on the negative will result in more negative. Anyway, there was a very cute boy in this class and he got noticed quite often for his "misbehavior". The teacher would call him by name, state what she wanted corrected (with some "I'm so tired of this" attitude in the voice), and always noticed when he was off task.

Anyway, I was sitting by this cute kindergartener one morning, and he was on task, focused, and really working on what he was supposed to be working on. Wow, I thought, he is "right on". So I decided to acknowledge all of his effort. So I said something like, " Wow, ______, you are focused and working on your assignment. That is so helpful." He replied back with a complete straight face and arms crossed in front of his chest, "I'm not helpful, I'm bad!"

I was dumbfounded. I looked him in the eyes and he was completely serious. I really understood the belief behind the behavior. This sweet, cute kindergartener really believed that he was "bad". Well, as we looked into each others eye, I got the giggles because he was so serious and sooooo wrong about himself. So, I smiled.... he smiled.... I giggled.... he began to giggle.... and in the end we both just laughed and laughed.

That day, I heard clearly from the mouth of one babe.... there is always a belief (maybe consciously, maybe unconsciously) behind "mis" behavior

About Dodie

2008-04-02T15:30:00.000-07:00

I have a Bachelors Degree in Elementary Education and a Masters Degree in Adult Education. I taught 5th grade for 10 years and was a math specialist grades k-5 for one year. I was introduced to Positive Discipline in 1995, the year my son was born. I took a two day training called Positive Discipline in the Classroom. It changed me and my view of teaching in a tremendously wonderful way.

I began helping students feel more belonging and significance. We had class meetings daily for connection and encouragement. We solved problems as a class instead of me simply punishing students for mistakes. My classroom felt more like a family than a competitive environment. We learned from each other, helped each other, and were changed by each other. I'm grateful for all of the students that have been in my classroom and ALL that I have learned from them!! (can you guess that their skill level in manhy academic areas improved dramatically the year they were in my class? And no, it wasn't because I'm a black belt at math or reading....but that they felt safe and capable. They were willing to make mistakes, try new skills, and take risks on new and challenging activities)

I decided to stop teaching in the spring of 1999, to spend time with my two young children, and to simply slow down. In the spring of 2004, when my sweet daughter began kindergarten, I was ready for something more. I remembered how much I loved and was inspired by Positive Discipline so I played around on the internet and learned that there was a whole PD association! I loved it's tools and skills so much and had grown as a human being as a result of it, I decided to become certified in it. I decided that if I wasn't going to share PD tools and skills with my own students, how cool would it be to facilitate teacher and parent trainings with it. To share it with 30 teachers, who then share it with 30 students.. (ooohh)..or to facilitate a class with 15 parents and they go home and encourage their own children...(ahhh)..now that is an amazing effect.

I spent a good year and a half becoming a Certified Positive Discipline Associate. Now I am honored to share Positive Discipline with many parents and teachers all over the valley. Positive Discipline is based on the theories and philosophies of Alfred Adler. Because Alfred Adler's model was so affective for me, teachers, and parents, I wanted to learn more. During my certification process, I hired a life coach to help suppport me in all of the forward movement. The professional coaching I experienced was so empowering for me that in 2007 I decided to go to the Adler School of Professional Coaching. It seemed like the perfect mix of professional coaching and Adlerian theory. So now, I am an Adler Trained Professional Coach (in the process of becoming certified). I, presently, coach teachers who are challenged with classroom management issues and coach "regular" people to find more fulfillment and joy in their lives.

Truthfully, there is no greater gift I can give myself, my children, or my family than to be sharing Positive Discipline tools with teachers and parents weekly. It is almost impossible for me to do a teacher training in the afternoon on respectful relationships and then go home and chew my children out. Hmmm. Lucky me!